I have been going back and forth in my head on if I want to POAS (Pee On Stick-referring to a home pregnancy test) or to Not Pee. I am not sure what I am feeling inside and do not think I am feeling anything at all. Thank goodness the clinic I attend tests in 7 days for me 9 since the 7th day would be on a saturday...great 2 more days of ignorant bliss if I choose. But would rather than stress over testing just blessings, baby dust, and 2 more days to tell my embie to stay with mommy.
On one hand I do not want to know, on the other I want to know a head of time to either be extremely happy or deal with whatever I may need to. I am hoping for the best, I want a baby, me and DH both. My temptation increases day to day but I have some good and bad things to keep me distracted.
BAD NEWS, GOOD NEWS SECTION
The Bad-I found out that our dept would be closing down soon and the office moved an hour away, this would be okay except I already drive 30 mins to work so an hour and a half for me would not be practical that would be 3 hours of travel time and too stressful besides wont even entertain it if offered. I am sworn to secrecy so I have been walking around with this all week and I feel bad that I know but glad that I know. All savings have been depleted on traveling, meds, and our result having to pay out of pocket for the doctor. My plan is to wait it out and be as surprised as everybody else when the ax falls, I plan to go back to school too, I have always had a strong interest in Law, we shall see. The plan is no more spending, and the wedding plans probably will be tweaked but I have so much faith if NOT working and going to school is too much then I will go back to work. DH has a trade but as such one week he is busy and the next he may not be, it isnt ideal and the medical insurance is probably my biggest worry...which reminds me to make a bunch of appointments in the next coming weeks and not touch my vacation time since I will get paid for them.
The Good- Life is good and everyday is a gift. My Happy and positive outlook on things, the reassuring way I feel after speaking with God and also speaking to my Embie that was transferred to my uterus. It gives me peace so to go pee on a stick right now for me....may not be the best thing.
Hello there!!!! I just came across your site and want you to know my fingers are crossed for you! My name is Lilly and my husband and I will be starting IVF this year - but I'm looking into another clinic which offers Mini-IVF, so I am looking for others who have gone through the Mini-IVF experience.
ReplyDeleteGOOD LUCK and I hope you post about your BFP! :D
Hello Lilly,
DeleteThank you so much for keeping me in your thoughts and fingers crossed. How exciting that you will be starting MINI IVF, what clinic are you using? I went to New Hope Fertility Center in NYC. When are you starting? Mini Ivf is great because it is less meds. If you want I can give you a link for the clinic I used for the many women that did Mini Ivf.
There is a clinic here in Indianapolis - "Family Beginnings" - I REALLY hope it works out because the cost is only $6850 compared to the first fertility clinic we have been working with - they want $14,000 for standard!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI've heard of the New Hope Fertility Center - it's apparently huge on the fertility website I just joined. Course, we are in Indiana and NY is too far away. I know they do clinical trials there at NHFC, which I'm all for (I work in the clinical trial industry...so i don't know if i'd be allowed to because of that...) but anyways, NY is just too far away from Indiana. Hubby wouldn't go for it.
Can't wait to hear more though!!!!