This journey is really not what I expected.....

I had no idea I would be going through these loops. I naively thought I would have gotten my BFP ( Big Fat Pregnant) and went on to enjoy being pregnant not going to the doctor weekly and sometimes twice a week to chart my levels and to try to see if my pregnancy will or could ever be viable. Getting to this point took so much and I do wish that the fight was over and we won, so we could celebrate. I am still celebrating in my heart because the truth is I got pregnant on my first IVF-FET cycle, just in limbo if it will yield us a baby.

I am not complaining because this is the path chosen, I won't waste too much emotions on the why's or the why not's. I really want this baby, more than anything I could ever imagine but I know it is not up to me. There are many cases where heartbeats are not heard or fetuses not seen for 8-10 weeks and I am praying I fall in those categories and if I am not then I have to live with that and be okay just the same.

My spotting is there now daily as of last week, brown most of the times but there has been some light red only when I wipe. Also by using this calculation it says I am 9 weeks and it makes me a little sad.

http://www.ivf.ca/fet5dayduedate.php



I came across this prayer below though and thought I would re-post it and share it. I love it and hope that if someone else is going through my current situation would find strength in this prayer.

Ezek 16:6 "Then I passed by and saw you kicking about in your blood, and as you lay there in your blood I said to you, "Live!"

Baby in the name of Jesus I prophecy the Word of God over your life by professing that you will live and not die and proclaim what the Lord has done (Psa 118:17). I come against the name of miscarriage and the symptoms of miscarriage and you must bow down and leave! I command every part of my body to function the way God created you to because you are fearfully and wonderfully made. That means every hormone is to get into balance and function perfectly not only during my pregnancy and delivery but for the rest of my life!

Jesus is the Word of God and I speak the life of Jesus into my womb, which says I will NOT miscarry. Right now according to Isaiah 53:4-5 I claim healing over any complication within my or my baby's body. Lord I thank you that you are restoring me to perfect health and healing me from all of my wounds (Jer 30:17).

Father I commit my baby and my pregnancy into your hands. I thank you according to your Word that you will take charge of the growth and development of my baby by knitting every part of them together without any defect or complication. I know that you will perfect that which concerns me and you will not forsake the work of your own hands because your mercy and loving-kindness endure forever.(Psa 38:8 AMP).

I take authority over fear and oppression for they are under my feet for I have been given a spirit of power a sound mind and self-control. I pray right now for your perfect peace to come upon me and to guard my heart and my mind in you. Lord I thank you for this miracle and for your Word because it says if I believe I will receive whatever I ask for in prayer(Mark 11:24).